Tuesday, June 23


A far more accurate account of the events of that fateful morning...

Baby bear goes downstairs, sits in his small chair at the table. He looks into his small bowl. It is empty. 'Who's been eating my porridge?' he squeaks.

Daddy Bear arrives at the big table and sits in his big chair. He looks into his big bowl and it is also empty. 'Who's been eating my porridge?!?' he roars.

Mummy Bear puts her head through the serving hatch from the kitchen and yells, 'For God's sake, how many times do I have to go through this with you idiots? It was Mummy Bear who got up first. It was Mummy Bear who woke everyone in the house. It was Mummy Bear who made the coffee. It was Mummy Bear who unloaded the dishwasher from last night and put everything away. It was Mummy Bear who swept the floor in the kitchen. It was Mummy Bear who went out in the cold early morning air to fetch the newspaper and croissants. It was Mummy Bear who set the damn table.

'It was Mummy Bear who walked the bloody dog, cleaned the cat's litter tray, gave them their food, and refilled their water.

'And now that you've decided to drag your sorry bear-asses downstairs and grace Mummy Bear with your grumpy presence, listen carefully, because I'm only going to say this once....

'I HAVEN'T MADE THE DAMN PORRIDGE YET!!!'

15 comments:

rosemary said...

damn straight momma bear!!!!

Beverly said...

LOLOLOL, I would say LMAO, but I don't like to use that word.

Grannymar said...

That is so funny!

Granny Annie said...

I always knew there was another side to that story! LOL

oklhdan said...

Sad thing is she will have to repeat the whole story the next day!

Pat said...

I wish I'd thought of that in the days when I was Mommy Bear.

Evil Twin's Wife said...

That's the story of my life!

Fran aka Redondowriter said...

Way to go momma bear.

John said...

LMAO, that was funny.

Gilly said...

LOL! My daughter used to love the story of Goldilocks and the 3 bears! Think I will send her this version!

Star said...

Good morning chuckle Judy. It would be even funnier if it wasn't so accurate.

Arkansas Patti said...

Still chuckling Judy. Way to go momma. Also, what Olkhdan said.

Jamie Dawn said...

Good one!! Anyone who's been a mom can relate to that Mummy Bear. I sensed a tad bit of exasperation there.

:-)

srp said...

You go girl... mama bear!
I might have said... "I see four hands and four feet... get your own porridge!!!"

Debi said...

The truth after all these years is finally revealed. ROFL