Sunday, April 24

I've Been in Denial....

Storm has been ill for a while, which is obvious to me now, but it took a long time for it to sink in. She used to weigh 14.5 pounds and Saturday morning at the vet's office, she weighed only 8.5. I knew she was losing weight, but I laid it onto the fact that she seemed not to like any of the food I had been feeding her and her sister, Eclipse. The weight loss became evident about six months ago, but since no other symptoms were apparent, I didn't take her to the vet. While I was away for the funeral of my friend last week, mr. kenju reported in phone calls that she was lethargic and "not her old self", which I blamed on my being away. She was my shadow; I couldn't walk from one room to another without being followed by Storm, and when I was out of town or when I worked a lot of days in succession, she let me know how displeased she was. 

Friday evening, she insisted on going into the garage - where she usually didn't like to stay for long unless it was very hot - and then she loved it. There was a big box out there, from the deck chairs I bought recently. She got into that box and refused to move. I put a blanket in there for her and placed a bowl of water and some food nearby. She refused broiled chicken (her favorite food) and I knew that something must really be wrong.  This morning on my way to work, I took her to the vets office, where I learned that she probably had end-stage renal disease, from which there is no recovering. Blood work confirmed that, so I had no alternative other than to authorize them to put her down. This is the third time I have had to do that; one other cat and our dog had to be euthanized. It is one of the hardest things I'll ever have to do. Since the alternative was an animal who would be, at worst, in pain and at best, uncomfortable, there was no choice.

My younger daughter said, "Mom, you've had too much death lately" and I sure have to agree with her. My dearest old human friend and my dearest old animal friend all in the same ten day period. I don't think I could take much more, so I'm praying I won't have to.

Happy Easter to you and yours.

19 comments:

Granny Annie said...

Two dear friends gone...I am so heartily saddened by these major losses in your life. God bless you.

Laura said...

I have no doubt your Storm knew how much he was loved and was part of your family. If there is any tiny consolation in all of this, maybe it is that they are up in Heaven, looking around and thinking: "Can you believe this place?" And they are truly happy. My thoughts and prayers are with you.

Jay Simser said...

You did the last thing that you could do for your friend. See to it that there was no more suffering. Bless you for doing that. j

robin andrea said...

It has been a rough ten days. I am so sorry for your losses. I think you offered Storm the kindest path out. We should all be so lucky and loved.

Anonymous said...

Dear Kenju--It's called "tough love" when one must relieve an animal friend of its suffering. On Storm's behalf, I thank you for your courage and wisdom.

I am so sorry for both of your recent losses. Please treat yourself nicely until you can adjust to your new life without your dear friends.
Cop Car

amarkonmywall said...

Well, I was coming by to get the whole story and it's a very sad one. Storm has been your shadow and I've loved when she shows up in your posts. You've had way too much loss in too short a time. I guess the only thing about Storm is that we've been told it's a relatively peaceful way for cats to go, not much pain and mostly that final spell of lethargy and weight loss. McCloud is on that path...I'm really sorry, Judy. Losing Storm on the heels of your oldest friend doesn't seem fair, but then life isn't always, is it? Let's hope you get more than your share of sunshine and good days ahead.

Loren said...

It usually takes me five to ten years to recover enough from the loss of a pet to get another one. Luckily, at my age I'll only have to go through that experience one more time.

Feeling our pain.

Looking to the Stars said...

MY heart goes out to you, I am so sorry about Storm. We had to do the same thing with our 1st doxie 5 yrs ago. It was one of the hardest things to go thru. To lose 2 of the closest beings to you is heartbreaking, I'm so sorry Judy.

Pat said...

Sending you love and sympathy.xoxoxox

Beverly said...

So, so sorry.

Grannymar said...

You are in my thoughts!

Kay Dennison said...

I'm so sorry, Judy!!! Losing friends -- whether human or feline -- is always difficult.

May the pain you must be feeling subside.

srp said...

I am so sorry. I know how hard that decision is. Miss Chloe is going to be 19 this summer and she has had some kidney failure for a couple of years. She should eat a special food but won't touch it and has grown to love one specific type of canned food... so I give her as much as she wants. All of our cats are elderly now and this last year, all lost a little weight... except Chloe.. she actually gained a bit. I know it will not be too much longer before I have to say goodbye to her as well... and perhaps Daisy too. They leave such huge holes and yet, if we had never had them.. what joy and laughter we would have missed out on. I am so sorry.

Gilly said...

Oh Judy, I am so sorry. But you did the best thing. I am so sorry for the loss of your friend too.

Sometimes life is just too much, and all we can do is cry.

And all I can do if offer you a virtual hug and a shoulder.

LL Cool Joe said...

Oh no I'm so sorry for your loss Kenju. Gosh this has been such a bad time for you. :(

Pranavam Ravikumar a.k.a. Kochuravi said...

Very difficult to accept the fate sometimes, although its inevitable. I am sorry!

whiteycat said...

So sorry for your loss. Prayers from me and the Four Felines.

JCF said...

So sorry for your loss: Storm was a beautiful kitty.

Fran aka Redondowriter said...

Judy, I am so sorry to hear about Storm. It is always devastating when we have to have our pets euthanized, even when we know it is the most humane thing to do. I agree with your daughter that you've had enough death for now.