Thursday, February 25

How Do These People Survive?


ONE

Recently, when I went to McDonald's I saw on the menu that you could have an order of 6, 9 or 12 Chicken McNuggets.

I asked for a half dozen nuggets.

'We don't have half dozen nuggets,' said the teenager at the counter.

'You don't?' I replied.

'We only have six, nine, or twelve,' was the reply.

'So I can't order half dozen nuggets, but I can order six?'

'That's right.'

So I shook my head and ordered six McNuggets

(Unbelievable but sadly true...)

TWO

I was checking out at the local Walmart with just a few items and the lady behind me put her things on the belt close to mine. I picked up one of those 'dividers' that they keep by the cash register and placed it between our things so they wouldn't get mixed..

After the girl had scanned all of my items, she picked up the 'divider,' looking it all over for the bar code so she could scan it.

Not finding the bar code, she said to me, 'Do you know how much this is?'

I said to her 'I've changed my mind; I don't think I'll buy that today.'

She said 'OK,' and I paid her for the things and left.

She had no clue to what had just happened.

THREE

A woman at work was seen putting a credit card into her floppy drive and pulling it out very quickly.

When I inquired as to what she was doing, she said she was shopping on the Internet and they kept asking for a credit card number, so she was using the ATM 'thingy'

(keep shuddering!!)

FOUR

I recently saw a distraught young lady weeping beside her car. 'Do you need some help?' I asked.

She replied, 'I knew I should have replaced the battery to this remote door unlocker.. Now I can't get into my car. Do you think they (pointing to a distant convenience store) would have a battery to fit this?'

'Hmmm, I don't know. Do you have an alarm, too?' I asked.

'No, just this remote thingy,' she answered, handing it and the car keys to me. As I took the key and manually unlocked the door, I replied, 'Why don't you drive over there and check about the batteries. It's a long walk....'

PLEASE just lay down before you hurt yourself!!!

FIVE

Several years ago, we had an Intern who was none too swift. One day she was typing and turned to a secretary and said, 'I'm almost out of typing paper. What do I do?' 'Just use paper from the photocopier,' the secretary told her. With that, the intern took her last remaining blank piece of paper, put it on the photocopier and proceeded to make five 'blank' copies.

Brunette, by the way!!

SIX

A mother calls 911 very worried asking the dispatcher if she needs to take her kid to the emergency room, the kid had eaten ants. The dispatcher tells her to give the kid some Benadryl and he should be fine, the mother says, 'I just gave him some ant killer.......'

Dispatcher: 'Rush him in to emergency!'

Life is tough. It's even tougher if you're stupid!!!!

15 comments:

OldLady Of The Hills said...

Gee, I hope these things didn't actually happen....!! I must say that a few of them sound totally unbelievable--the people are so stupid..!!! Tell me someone made these u...PLLLLLEEEEAAASSSEEEEEE!(lol)

Gilly said...

I don't believe it!!!

Well, sadly, I do..........

16 years of education and we get that! (Its not much better in the UK - my sister went into her local superstore and saw an assistant putting out more (loose) potatoes. A lot of them were badly greened. She said you can't put those out, the green bits are poisonous. "Oh", said the girl "I thought they were just not ripe yet"........)

Grannymar said...

Can you hear me laugh?

I think I live a dull life.

LL Cool Joe said...

And I always thought I was stupid! The Walmart story cracked me up. :D

Pat said...

I'm speechless - an strangely comforted:)

Evil Twin's Wife said...

Those are great! I especially liked the one where the girl photocopied a blank page...DUH!

Olga said...

That was so sad--must be why tears are coming out of my eyes.

Beverly said...

Those are incredible, aren't they, and scary.

Lynn said...

Oh my - really? That's funny.

srp said...

We had a phlebotomist in the lab who was very good at her job... They were required to wear lab coats and we provided disposable paper coats so that they could be discarded when soiled... (OSHA reg). This young lady came in one day all distraught.... she had tried to iron the fold creases out of her coat with the iron set on high and with steam. Of course it made huge brown burn streaks..... she really had no idea that you couldn't iron paper like this.

And of course there are people who really do think that Cheerios are doughnut seeds. ;)

Nancy said...

When my son was working at the pizza shop a man came in and asked for a whole pizza.

Chris asked him if he wanted him to slice it in 6 pieces or 8 pieces.

The guy said,"Oh, just make it 6 pieces, I could never eat 8......

Kay Dennison said...

I believe it!!!!!!!! The lowest common denominator has dropped like a brick.

jaycoles@gmail.com said...

And have you noticed the cash registers that have pictures of the bills and coins on them so the cashier knows what to give in change. God forbid that they should still have to count your money back.

Tracie Nall said...

Wow! If those things actually happened around you, I wouldn't be surprised if you didn't become afraid to leave your house!!

That girl at Wal-Mart. Rough.

Granny Annie said...

Not only do they survive, they multiply.