Thursday, November 5

Sayings of Larry the Cable Guy

Yes, they are oldies, but they are still goodies!


A day without sunshine is like night.


On the other hand, you have different

fingers.


99 percent of lawyers give the rest a bad name.



Remember, half the people you know are below

average.

He who laughs last, thinks slowest.


Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm.


The early bird may get the worm, but the second

mouse gets the cheese in the trap.


Support bacteria. They're the only culture most

people have.

A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad

memory.


Change is inevitable, except from vending

machines.


If you think nobody cares, try missing a couple

of payments.


How many of you believe in psycho-kinesis?

Raise my hand.



OK, so what's the speed of dark?


When everything is coming your way, you're in

the wrong lane.


Hard work pays off in the future. Laziness pays

off now.


How much deeper would the ocean be without

sponges?


Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked

into jet engines.


What happens if you get scared half to death,

twice?


Why do psychics have to ask you your name?


Inside every older person is a younger person

wondering, 'What the heck happened?'

(OMG – YES!! To that one)


Light travels faster than sound. That's why some

people appear bright until you hear them speak.



Life isn't like a box of chocolates. It's more like a

jar of jalapenos. What you do today, might burn

your butt tomorrow.



18 comments:

Buzzardbilly said...

Larry the Cable Guy is infinitely more funny and more profound on paper when selected by you! Really, like you should manage his act and get him to act like he's from Nebraska and use his real accent because those are some great things to say that a lot of folks don't listen to because of his schtick.

kenju said...

BB, there is some truth in those sayings, and a degree of intelligence not heretofore ascertained in Larry! LOL

Granny Annie said...

Sometimes he is too gross but most of the time he is just funny and we love Larry.

Pat said...

We get many nights around hers:(

LL Cool Joe said...

Never heard of him but some of those sayings are so true!

Mar said...

Larry is a great and clever philosopher!!!

oklhdan said...

Loved these! So true as well!

robin andrea said...

Very funny. I especially like the one about psychokinesis. Good laughs.

tiff said...

The jalapenos one is my fave!

utenzi said...

I live by the "Hard work pays off in the future. Laziness pays off now" concept.

sage said...

Good sayings--he's pretty funny.

Beverly said...

Those are really good. Lots of truth in those words.

One Woman's Journey said...

Never heard any of them before (remember I live in the woods)
They made me smile.

Darlene said...

I like "Depression is just anger without the enthusiasm."

Jo said...

Omigosh, that made me laugh RIGHT OUT LOUD...!!!

Dianne said...

these are good, some of them are great
it's a shame Larry is so difficult to watch or listen to
I always want to clean his clothes, and get him a shirt with sleeves

Jen said...

LOL @ the second mouse.

Ginnie said...

I love the one about wondering if anyone cares...